Let's set the scene: It's 11:59 PM, a complete draft of my dissertation is due to my mentor's inbox in exactly 37 seconds, and I've written two-sentences in the last hour and a half. I open my browser with intent to email my mentor an apology and *accidentally* land on the Amazon cart I filled up when I first sat down to dissertate (to any PhD student, this is indeed a verb). My mouse hovers over the "Check Out" button and my urges to click are at a 10/10. I glance at the hot pink sticky. note plastered on my laptop which reads: "STOP" in bold lettering.
By "STOP", what my sticky note means is Stop, Take a step back, Observe, and Proceed mindfully and it is the first of many helpful distress tolerance skills. These skills are perfect for when our emotions are high, we have strong urges to act in ways that may not be effective for us, and need to make it through a situation without making it worse.
In this case, I use STOP (& sticky notes) to help myself resist urges to online shop when I'm really stressed. This skill is helpful for a variety of situations, including interpersonal conflict (imagine how much your relationships could improve if you paused before acting on urges to lash out!) and when our urges to act impulsively are hard to resist.
Join us for a discussion about STOP!
STOP
Didactic: 0:00 to 3:10
Practice: 3:10 to 8:10
Homework: 8:10 to end
Homework: STOP
Consider – where in your life could you be more effective by just pressing pause?
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Set up reminders to practice your STOP skill – sticky’s, reminders on your phone, tell your partner/friend to yell stop at random intervals. We want to practice this in low-stress scenarios so we build the muscle and can use it in high stress. Record your game plan here:
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Reflect: How is life different when you press pause? What might be the benefits of this practice:
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